This research aims to study “ why researchers themselves decide to leave the position of kindergarten after obtaining the qualification of kindergarten teachers?” The research attempts to discover from the teacher Siao Yun, who “finds joy in teaching” the reason why she left the position of a kindergarten teacher, and retrieved the motivation of teaching. The research undertakes to collect and arrange data in a way of “in-depth interview” and “self-narrative”. On the journey, we see:
The teaching life of the teacher Siao Yun, in general, is a procedure of “looking for children’s garden”, and is also a turning point of educational ideas from “I like playing with children” to “ seeing the children’s need” and “bringing children a happy childhood”. Although she faces a family problem, and is unable to adapt to the adversity and trouble of teaching surrounding on the scene; for her, a good working surrounding, the support from peer teachers, religious sentiments, and her persistence and passion for the kindergarten teaching job are motivations that make her persist in ideals and find pleasure in teaching.
Looking back on the self’s teaching life, I feel it is a process of “looking for an education mind”. While working as a teacher of American language for children and obtaining a qualification, then I decide to leave the position of kindergarten teachers, and change the current job to different teaching jobs. Walking along the way, I feel at a loss and afraid about teaching in my mind.
I discover in the process of self-narration: since childhood, I have been endowed with the disposition of “becoming a teacher”. After my family and I could not identify with the role of a private kindergarten teacher, and could not face the conflict between educational ideal and field work, I felt powerless and frustrated towards teaching.
On the journey of the exploration, I see from the teacher Siao Yun that “a happy childhood experience” is the molding foundation of a kindergarten teacher’s educational ideas; and that a kindergarten teacher must look for a working location where the kindergarten culture goes well with the self’s educational ideas. Only then can one grow steadily in the merry work.
For me, the biggest harvest is seeing myself change from the state of being at a loss, grumbling to active and optimistic, because I appreciate that only after finding one’s fixed position, facing oneself honestly, and braving the adversity can one develop the true wisdom and obtain the genuine self-esteem and calmness.